Moody Decisions

While reading the works of the psychologist Albert Ellis, who has spent the last 50-plus years developing his Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy, I was struck by the number of “maybe, sometimes, most probably, likely, possibly” statements in his work. The more he’s worked to improve his therapy, the more he’s realized you can’t make definite statements when it comes to giving advice to people.

With that in mind, here is some advice that worked for me and may work for you, if you approach it scientifically – experiment, observe and record the results, repeat and refine your experiment. Put your mind and effort into the advice and mold it to you.

Never make a decision when you are in a mood. By “mood,” I mean the term as is commonly used in expressions such as, “I’m in a mood,” or “he’s feeling moody.” A person in a mood has a negative view on practically everything. Richard Rose described it as a clouded glass. Such clouded states of perception may linger for hours or days.

I don’t know when I decided to never make a decision in a mood, but it is a guideline that served me well. It kept me from abandoning commitments; from taking actions that would lead to a change in priorities. I’m not referring to everyday decisions like what toppings to get on your pizza. I mean decisions involving commitments: major courses of action and expenditures of energy.

Of course, you must have a level of awareness about your self in order to recognize a mood, in order to remember where you were (mentally) and where you are now. Also, you must find the faith that your mood will return to its typical state – which it will, but don’t take my word, observe your self in action.

What do you do while waiting? Keep your present commitments as best as you can. Procrastinate important decisions until the mood lifts. I found it better to tread water than to start swimming in the direction a mood sent me. For advice on shortening moods, see the essay “Taking a Break.” [link to this in the archives]

Not all moods are negative. Sometimes it seems we are full of power and potential and our excitement in beginning a new undertaking can barely be contained. As for making decisions in these positive moods, you need to figure that out for yourself. I was never one to get fired up and inspired for more than a few minutes, so there was little chance of me making commitments in that short span of time. A little self-honesty will reveal whether or not you are a victim of your positive moods.

Not that you don’t work when inspired. If you find yourself committing to projects in moods of inspiration, and then dropping them, one of two things is happening: either you are lazy, or you are making unrealistic commitments. You be the judge, or if you can’t, then ask an honest friend.

If you find your negative mood stretching into weeks or months, then “possibly” you are no longer in a mood and the advice in this essay will not apply. You may be the victim of depression or a change in state of mind, calling for another course of action. Hopefully, that will be the topic of a future essay¹.